I’ve been getting a lot of these lately, and I guess I just want you all to know what I think when I read them.
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The DIY Couturier: 21 Tips to Keep Your Shit Together When You're Depressed.
A while ago, I penned a fairly angry response to something circulating on the internet – the 21 Habits of Happy People. It pissed me off beyond belief, that there was an inference that if you weren’t Happy, you simply weren’t doing the right things.
I’ve had depression for as long as I can…
npr:
Thou ruttish hasty-witted puttock! It’s like a Harry Potter novel. — tanya b.
Make Your Own Shakespearean Insults (Thou gleeking, crook-pated flap-dragon)! Shakespeare insult kit…
Source.Thou unmuzzled bat-fowling giglet!
(Source: vintageanchorbooks)
MAN, THAT’S NICE.
NICE AND SEASONAL.
JUST REALLY NICE, IN A SEASONAL KIND OF WAY.
WARM TOO.
SUPER WARM.
I THINK IT’S LOVELY, AND ALSO QUITE WARM.
IS THERE ANYTHING MORE PLEASANT, WARM, LOVELY, AND SEASONAL THAN A NICE ROARING FIRE?
NO.
NOPE.
NO, NOT REALLY.
NO. THERE IS NOT.
I STILL CAN’T BELIEVE WE THREW GARY IN THERE, THOUGH.
I STILL CAN’T BELIEVE GARY OWNED, LET ALONE PLAYED, A KENNY CHESNEY CHRISTMAS ALBUM.
HONESTLY. IT’S NOT LIKE WE HAD A CHOICE.
NOPE. HAD TO BE DONE.
IT WAS FOR THE BEST.
ALL THINGS CONSIDERED, IT WAS BOTH MERCIFUL AND FAIR.
WHAT A SEASONAL WAY TO GO.
RIGHT? SUPER SEASONAL.
AND WARM TOO.
WHAT A NICE, WARM, SEASONAL WAY TO GO.
CAN WE PLEASE QUIT PLAYING OUT SOME ELABORATE MODERN MATING RITUAL OF TUMBLR LIKES AND TWITTER RETWEETS AND JUST OPENLY ADMIT THAT WE WANT TO GET TOGETHER AND DO SOME SHIT TO EACH OTHER THAT NORMALLY ONLY HAPPENS IN USHER SONGS?
PLEASE?
MY KEYBOARD IS FALLING APART.
This actually made me quite sad.
“I Think I Am In Friend-Love With You” written by and illustrated by Yumi Sakugawa, published in Sadie Magazine, 2012.
(Source: durianseeds)
DOES THE MOST HANDSOME BOYFRIEND IN THE ENTIRE SAVANNA HAVE A LITTLE HANGOVER?
I DON’T KNOW. DO YOU?
OH SHUT UP. WHY ARE YOU SO ADORABLE?
I PUT MY FACE ON YOUR FACE AND ABSORB IT THROUGH OSMOSIS.
SHUT UP TWICE. I LOVE YOU. DO YOU WANT TO GO ANTIQUING WHEN YOU CAN OPEN YOUR EYES ALL THE WAY? I WANT TO GET SOME NEW TABLES FOR THE DEN.
I ALWAYS WANT TO GO ANTIQUING. I WOULD GO ANTIQUING EVEN IF I WAS DEAD.
AIN’T NONE OF THE KIDS WANTED TO GO TO THE PUMPKIN PATCH LAST MONTH, AND NOW THEY’RE SAYING THEY AIN’T GONNA GO TO THE MALL WITH ME THIS WEEKEND. THEY’RE “TOO OLD” TO HANG OUT WITH THEIR MOMMA. CAN YOU BELIEVE THAT? NOT A ONE OF THEM WILL WEAR THE COOL DRAGONFLY SWEATERS I BOUGHT ‘EM AT T.J. MAXX NEITHER, NO MATTER HOW MANY TIMES I ASK ‘EM ON FACEBOOK. DESIGNER FASHIONS AT AFFORDABLE PRICES. WHAT MORE COULD YOU WANT IN THIS WORLD? TAMMY ACTUALLY BLOCKED ME. DAMN NEAR BROKE MY HEART IN TWO.
IT’S LIKE I DON’T EVEN KNOW MY BABIES NO MORE.
WELCOME HOME. I THOUGHT YOU MIGHT BE IN A BAD MOOD FROM WORKING SO HARD SO I CREATED MANY FUN SURPRISES FOR YOU ALL OVER THE HOUSE.
SEVERAL SURPRISES WERE MADE INSIDE MY OWN BODY, WHICH IS VERY CLOSE TO MY HEART, SPATIALLY.
SEVERAL OTHERS ARE ART PROJECTS I MADE USING SIMPLE HOUSEHOLD ITEMS LIKE YOUR TRASH, THE FLAVORLESS MARSHMALLOW STUFF INSIDE THE COUCH, AND THE CONTENTS OF THE PANTRY.
THANK YOU FOR NOT SHUTTING THE PANTRY DOOR, BY THE WAY. THERE WERE SO MANY USEFUL ART SUPPLIES IN THERE.
WELL NOW, THAT WAS QUITE A TUMBLE. AND LOOK AT THE WAY YOUR LEGS ARE BENT. YOU MUST BE IN A GREAT DEAL OF PAIN.
I’D CALL 911 BUT THE PHONE’S ON THE TABLE NEXT TO THE COUCH AND WE ALL KNOW HOW YOU FEEL ABOUT ME CLIMBING UP ON THE COUCH.
YOU’VE MADE YOUR OPINIONS ON THAT MATTER QUITE CLEAR, WITH THE SHOUTING AND THE NEWSPAPER ACROSS THE NOSE AND ALL.
YES SIR, I KNOW BETTER THAN TO CLIMB ON THAT COUCH.
OH WELL. HOPE EVERYTHING WORKS OUT FOR YOU. I’M OFF TO THE PARK.